Tag Archive: bad boss


New Year, New You?

I have seen you skulking around, checking out some of my weight-loss and food-issue  posts.

Picture by Cohdra

It is a new year and you want that one secret to losing weight, the one secret to losing that tummy. You want to know it because you want to use it. You might have even sat through at least one of those infomercials on the web hoping to hear it.

 I can share a few things with you about my journey of weight loss.

 I topped the scales at 220 pounds although I lied to myself and said I was 210. The clue should have been my waistline which expanded to 48 inches. My waist was bigger than my boobs. My favorite pieces of clothing were not fitting.

 So I did the hard stuff.

I started changing my diet, making sure I ate at least one piece of fresh fruit daily. I made sure to fit some sort of veggie in as well. About this time I gave up soda except for Pizza Night and replaced it with ice tea. Plus, I started drinking more water. McDonald’s stopped being a regular meal place.

Mad Woman, Picture by Mantasmagorical

But the thing that helped most in the last year was losing my job. The work was great; I enjoyed learning and getting better every month. What I hated was my boss, a scattered brain micro-manager who worked to make everyone’s life miserable. When I hear of her these days, I feel sorry for my old boss. She will always be the evil person she is now and feels she does not need to make any changes.

Leaving that toxic situation allowed me some other changes. Like being able to sleep at night. Newer studies are showing that getting your needed amount of sleep helps your body do the work it needs to do.

 Another big change was being able to relax. While I still worry about doing good work at my current job, it doesn’t wear on me like it did at my last job. Plus, my family reports enjoying being around me once again. I am calmer, happier, not ready to jump at every wrong happening in the house.

 I no longer mentally prepare myself for dealing with a stubborn mule who did not believe in communication and treated any brainstorming meeting with me as wasted time. I mean, who wants to take the time to think of ways to improve your product? (yep, still bitter)

 One of the biggest changes was adding in exercise so I could speed up my metabolism and work off the fatty foods I love eating. A 75-pound black Labrador pulling you along for a walk requires energy to keep up.

Picture by Alvimann

 The other big change is no longer stopping off at McDonald’s every other day for a three pack of chocolate chip cookies and a huge sweet tea. Or stopping off at the gas station for a candy bar or a Little Debbie’s snack and can of Arizona Sweet Tea. I no longer require as much comfort food as I have in the past. 

The short of the long is to really get that weight off, I had to leave a toxic situation. Maybe that is not your situation. But if you actually hope to lose weight, you have to work at it. It requires making lifestyle changes in your diet and exercise routines.

 That is what it took for me to lose nearly 30 pounds. That is what it took for my waist to measure just under 42 inches. No whey powder, no yucky shakes or diet pills. There is no magic formula that will keep it off once you lose it other than that.

Picture by Xandert

If that is what you are ready to do, jump on my wagon and let’s see how far you can go.

What are you willing to do to finally lose the weight?

One of the blogs on my blogroll that I have enjoyed reading is Living Dilbert

I know every story this professional talks about when she describe the antics 

Me after a day at work for Bad Boss. Picture by Darren Hester

 

of her bad bosses. Fake raises, being asked to work on a big project on Friday afternoon, zombie like behavior – all of this is familiar to me. Now I can laugh about it but last year I was living it. 

I had one of those bosses that made you groan in the morning and wonder why staying in bed was not an option. After a while I became expert in knowing when bad boss was having a bad day. The pacing and collecting of garbage was almost always followed by some tirade. Nine times out of ten, I was that target. 

How bad was it? My co-workers would joke about how whatever was wrong was my fault. We once looked at the agenda for an upcoming meeting and someone said “It’s all about what you have done wrong.” I was never busy according to the boss, never doing anything. 

When bad boss said jump I had better say how high or know she would just get worse during the day. If she set a procedure, it would get changed. I fought to maintain good quality of work because I actually loved doing my job, loved the opportunities it gave me, loved being called by my title. 

What I did not love was being treated as if I knew nothing, was capable of nothing. All this despite the fact I was on the team that won an award for overall improvement, despite the fact I was the one who planned things months in advance. And that lead to great anger on my part. Especially after the security cameras went in with no explanation, no notice. 

When bad boss finally fired me, I was happy. I had given myself a timeline to go, waiting for one more deadline. But quite frankly, it was too long to wait. I was no longer the fun me, I was a mean nasty person looking at everything for some sort of conspiracy, just like my bad boss. I was becoming the worst type of employee – mean and resentful despite keeping up with my deadlines and doing good work. It was not who I wanted to be. 

My husband was supportive during this time of post firing, thankful the situation was finally over. He was tired of hearing DAILY bad boss stories – as were every single one of the spouses of my co-workers who left or were fired themselves. 

By Kitty Martini and Candice Reed, picture from Barnes and Noble.com

 

I recently picked up a book called Thank You For Firing Me! by Kitty Martini and Candice Reed that has helped me get through some of the rough patches and begin to look towards a future. I do have a plan for making something different happen in my life . And from bad boss, I have learned plenty. 

I have learned how I want to run an office, to make sure I have an employee handbook  – no  matter what. I want to have jobs outlined and have regular meetings to make sure everyone is close to being on the same page. But most importantly, I am going to treat my employees like the valued members of the team that they are. I never, ever want to have people feel about me the way I felt about my former boss. 

I understand there are going to be times they think I am an idiot or that I am a bit of a ditz. But I never want a person in my office watching my movements so closely that they can predict when I am about to go off on them for no reason. And be right! 

Karyn Bowman lives in Kankakee County with her outdoor writer husband and four children. Become friends with Karyn on Facebook.